I closed my eyes and leant against the wall, my heart beating hard within my chest. It was disturbing to acknowledge the effect she'd had on me.Jane, my previous girlfriend, was twenty-three. She'd possessed a healthy sex drive and had demonstrated no reluctance to experiment. I'd introduced her to a little play bondage and she soon willingly indulged my wildest fantasies. I would tie her to the bed and tease her to distraction with anything that came to hand; feathers, ice cubes, and even once a course-bristled hairbrush that had her begging for mercy when applied to her sensitive nipples. At the end of a long evening, I would cover her body with mine and screw her until she screamed in ecstasy.Soon however, like most of my relationships, the candle burnt down and the two of us realised we lacked sufficient things in common to furnish the foundation for anything permanent.My thoughts returned to Olivia. I couldn't deny that I found her attractive in a physical sense, despite the. "You and Sammy were the best thing that ever happened to me. But... "Some things are just not meant to be... "I wish this hadn't happened... But... "I had to protect you."I know you would give your life to save me."I couldn't let that happen."Now I have to leave."Please don't blame yourself."It's not your fault."I was broken a long time ago, long before we met."I'm sorry,"I love you,"Julie."She printed the note, and then stapled the lyrics page, torn from the first CD liner, to the bottom of the note. It was Macy Gray's "The Letter."At the top of the page, she wrote simply, "Mom." She took a highlighter, and applied it to the words:"Mama don't be sad for me"Life was a heartache, and now I'm finally free."Then she stapled the page from the second CD to the bottom of the first. It was REM's "Everybody Hurts."At the top of the page, she wrote, "Bobby — I'll be fine. Take care of Sammy and your mom. Love, Julie."She took her highlighter, and applied it to words in different parts of the.
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